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It is not possible to tell the true character of a man you may argue. Well, whereas, I agree with you in this, we can as well differ in so many other aspects. Boys will always be boys. This is a common saying that is usually uttered by ladies. Whatever they mean is none of my business. I say this because the world has produced many types of characters some of which astonish, amaze, and others amuse. However, the true measure of a man depends neither on the aforementioned nor on a few things that you may be thinking of.
Do not worry why I call them a few. Of course, they are not many. Are they? Some people believe that since mathematicians follow a set of formulae to arrive at a mathematical solution, we should do the same in ascertaining the true value of a man. Granted, there are things that men do that boys don’t and vice versa. Whatever the case, a true man will always gain the confidence of the beholder. In this case, I am talking about any person who could be interested with good qualities and values.
We have seen a lot in the society that surrounds us no matter how small it may be. Whether from such or not, you too have witnessed the trend that must have started when Nelson Mandela left prison after serving a jail term of 28 years.The behavior is seemingly not ending anytime soon. What will be done to this ‘digital generation’ of men is way past our ability. Maybe we pray that it will end soon before the Nazarene descends. But prior to that, we need to understand what is used to measure a true man thus separating him from the boys.
“A man is measured by his
deeds not misdeeds of fame.”
In yester years, it was evident that a man behaved one. Today, while they are supposed to emulate, they mutate. What will help our men? To answer that question, one has to call a public baraza in every County every Sunday afternoon for a decade. If you think this is a haphazard calculation, look at it this way: why is it that when something is wrong in any community, for instance a row between a husband and his wife, is taken before a council of elders for arbitration? Is it not believed that they have wisdom? If I can believe my little mind, that is the reason. If then that is so, think of how far we are as a country to produce real people-men of substance.
Many people, however have their say on what they believe a true man should be like. I have no offense with you because you are entitled to your own opinion. While talking about how to solve relationship issues among women, Steve Harvey a renowned American TV comedian and author, told his audience who comprised women that they should think like women but act like a man. Are you seeing any similarity in this, for a lady to be fully acting as a woman, she has to think of who she is, but act indifferently. That will also apply to men. A true man should think like a man but act as a lady. Don’t be too fast to brush off this idea. Women are known all over to be compassionate, loving to their families and children treating them with much tenderness. What if all men acted the same way? How I wish I had the ability to. But I am putting on the efforts and I assure you that I will not relent until I reach the Promised Land. If you think this is not reasonable, be honest with me and tell me if you like what you see our men doing as we hear from the media. It hurts to see those entrusted with responsibilities turn to their flock as if there was a drought more than what the Prophet Elijah witnessed in Sarephat.
I mean what happened? When people are under the influence of drugs they are doomed to act crazy you would say. One may ask what of when they are sane and sound in mind without any history of cerebral dysfunction? Sanity and maturity is expected.The truth is that a man will never be measured by what he has, if it were so, we would be having a different subject to discuss about. Starting with the richest man Solomon down to our business moguls, we would be having real men. Surprisingly, they too need to learn from this. A true man should be looked at from a different angle not what we see in soaps, reality shows, and in the wider streets of major cities in the world.
A man is measured by what he does to others in every step of his life. I don’t mean that they need to dish out money because many of whom I call men earn a pittance. Yes, they need to exhibit soundness of mind in whatever they do whether in the office, at home, with colleagues watching EPL and in a matatu. Does it matter what a man puts on? Well, the answer depends on your view towards the stripping of ladies that has marred most parts of the country recently. Our men wear like they want as if they own the whole world. Besides, they believe so much in their ego to the extent of forgetting that behind every man there should be a strong and capable woman who most men don’t consult. They make important decisions without involving their mates even on things that affect them directly. What a folly!
Who said that a man will absolutely die if he said sorry to his fellow even to a lady? Don’t you think that if they deserve to be pardoned by others, they should also be in the forefront to apologize whenever they wrong somebody? A man is never superior to a woman. Granted, they have been given the mandate to take the lead in almost every forum. But when you witness our men of fame battle it out in the loftiest house on the land then you will realize that there is a problem somewhere. Who will tell them in my behalf? A man is measured by his deeds not misdeeds of fame.
“A true man should think
like a man but act as a lady.”
We respect our veterans some of whom have not received a decent burial for over a decade following their unselfish efforts to see that our country gains ‘independence’ that never was. While that is true, for those heroes, others are amassing themselves with titles such as ‘the most wanted pedophile.’ Surely, where will we drive our country to if not into a deep ditch? While you are contemplating that question, allow me introduce to you another angle, do you know of a man who fathered a child and now he stays with a different family because the then wife was not able to give him a baby son? Suppose three or so women never did the same in a row, how many children could this man be entitled to as a father when the end of times comes? You should style up brother. Hardly do you know that you are the problem. You are the one to be held accountable for gender, balancing, not your wives.
You could be having the money and power but the way you use them depicts how you are. As mentioned earlier, a man who shows off himself in a public transport vehicle should always beware that if indeed he were what he purports to be, he wouldn’t be in a cue in the first place. Affluent men leave the office at 4 o ‘clock accompanied by their drivers and security guards. So stop what you think you are doing. There will come a time you will be required to showcase your energy, but I am surprised that you might not by then. So if my version of whom a man is wrong to this end, then you might not agree with me in a few lines to come. But if there has been much sense, you are definitely yearning to see what ensues.
What you will do
Do not struggle if you are not able to say sorry but kindly avoid embarrassing others because you will be forced to say those words in a hard way. All humans are equal. Since that is a conventional truth, wherever you are, know that everyone has a right to decide what they do whenever they want to do it provided they are not your children.Consult with your wife, listen to her as she makes her humble suggestions and guide her in making right decisions. We are all entitled to our taste and preference. To that end, let them wear the way that pleases them as long as they do not infringe my mind and heart. You too should learn not to show me your boxers. I have mine.
Your checklist:
How do you treat your wife?
How often do you apologize if any?
What is your mode of dress?
How do you feel when others dress indecently?
Do you consult your mate?
Do you get offended when admonished? Why?
How have your views changed after reading this article?
My fellow
lecturers, you are not innocent either. You are also catalysts to this
phenomenon. I don’t mean all of you. In fact I know of a few that are super
gentle, responsible family heads, fathers and guardians. You have my innermost
commendations. At least, I associate with you. 
